MY LOST LOVE

lonelymanI feel a sudden thirst
For the one i left behind
An aching that will not recede
Or heart break that cannot heal on its own
My skin is dried up like leather
Darkened by patches of loneliness
Even tears have refused my eyes
Fingernails are filled with dirt
For digging the ground in punishment
Knees have been scathed
For existing on the hard ground
In prayer that you will come back

I feel a sudden hunger
For the one i said goodbye to
A chilling insanity that will not leave
Or heart wrenching emotions that will not stay
My skin is feeling deadened
Darkened by colorless sweats of solitude
Even tears have gone missing
Fingernails cracked in ugliness
For scratching wood searching comfort
Knees have been weakened
For refusing to get up and walk
In moments i should have stood up for you

I feel a sudden breathlessness
For the one i refused to love
An inexplicable depletion of oxygen
Or heart knifing pain that grows
My skin has been wringed of moisture
Darkened by airless motions of hurt
Even tears have given up hope on me
Fingernails completely discolored
For clutching at my empty chest
Knees have collapsed on their own
For having no air to breath
In this cocoon of guilt i have built

I feel a sudden dizzying need
For my lost love i need to find
A crazy panting that will not give me peace
Or heart throbbing wants for her kiss
My skin was becoming cold without her
Brightened by thoughts of her touch
Even tears have returned to my eyes
Fingernails i have cut to hold her again
For her smooth skin needs tenderness
Knees strengthened to meet her again
For she needs me strong, able
In this chest of mine she calls her home

Copyright September 2015

Mulunga Alukwe

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